Monday, November 24, 2008

Pictures O' Bama

Barack Obama. Brotha can pose for a picture.

Seriously. He's art.

Saturday, November 22, 2008


So, recently I've been reading books and stuff (because I heard girls dig guys who can read word drawings). Usually when work is moving relatively slow I pull out a book that has recently been close to my heart. It's called World War Z, by Max Brooks. Now I'm not a literary expert, of the like...3 books I've actually read outside of class, this is one that's probably drawn me in the most.

It's about Zombies, hence the Z in world war Z. Now, I know anyone who's seen a zombie movie or whatnot kind of has an idea of how the story sort of unfolds. You wake up one morning, your husband's trying to gnaw at your neck, you run away, your kids try to gnaw at your neck, you continue to run. The entire town is trying to gnaw at your neck, you book it. Eventually you find people who are not interested in gnawing on your neck, and you try to survive against the homos that are into trying to get at your neck or whatever. World War Z isn't really so much about the neck gnawing homos eating the last of the humans, well I is. But it's more about the stories of the survivors, and their stories.

(Zombie vs. shark, totally unrelated)

The book is described as an oral retelling of the zombie wars. Which is, you know...right. I mean, it's basically a series of interviews with the fictional survivors of a fictional war against the undead (this format is perfect to pick up and produce a TV series of movie out of, I think). With most zombie stories, there is concentration on a specific part. Like, say for instance, a movie gives a breif explanation of how an outbreak has begun, it'll probably not extend it's story into how the survivors of the outbreak live their lives afterward. World War Z covers all the bases though, it characterizes a very realistic explanation of how the outbreak started spreading, it continues by discussing people's reactions to the outbreak itself, it even describes how the tide of battle finally turns in a way that benefits the survivors.

I still haven't finished the book, but it's awesome. You should read it, or I'll sit on you.

Friday, November 21, 2008


I just had the best idea.

Smoreos. Waoh.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

About Face!

So, I signed up for my classes for next semester. Macroeconomics, Construction Materials and Methods, Sociology, and Chemistry, holla holla.

Chemistry is like my fisrt non-math based science class. I'm scared :O!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008



Taint Slaves

Pushovers, I hate them. Everyone has that one friend who's a "nice guy" who always lands the friend zone because girls don't like "nice guys". Well, tell your retarded, consistently single, "nice guy" friend to stfu.

There's a fine line between being nice, and being a pushover. Too many nice guys are really just pushovers. I hate that, seriously. Don't be a slave to the taint, you idiot.

Also, don't be desperate, I hate desperate people. Don't cling onto the first person that puts their hands out. Jesus, you're better than that, damnit. People probably just don't like you cuz you smell gross or something.

Also, I hate when people dress slutty. Put on some fucking pants, it's 30 degrees outside. Yes, your ass is HUGE, great, awesome, you can let people know that by actually wearing something to cover it.

Also, I hate bears. What's the deal with bears and picnic baskets?

Taint Slaves though, so many guys are taint slaves. It's not your fault ladies, or it probably is, some of you are total dick horders. You know who you are, but you're probably not reading this right now, are you? You're probably out there hording dicks. Fucking dick horder.

Dick Horders and Taint Slaves, there's too many of them in this world.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Potentially sweet pick up line:

I have never had intercourse...
I bet your mom and dad are probably really attractive...
Pretend you're my mom.
Your breath smells like pizza, I love that.

Stuff That I like: October/November

Music: Dr. Dog, Portugal The Man
Books: World War Z
Graphic Novels/Comics: Hellboy: Weird Tales
Artists: Ginette Lapalme, Michael Hacker
Games: Gears of War 2, Halo 3 (I'm finally getting into this on Live), Spiderman: Web of Shadows
Movies: Black And White


Monday, November 17, 2008


FUCK ORANGEADE. what the hell is it? It's not orange juice, it's not orange soda, what the hell is it? Orange colored sugar water? That's straight bullshit.

Eff that, first of all. If I want orange juice, I effing drink orange juice. If I want orange soda, I drink orange soda. But when I want to be real psised off and stuff, and want to puke everywhere, I drink orangeade (I never want to do that, so I never drink it).

Now, some homo in my house freaking buys two things of Orangeade. Let me tell you how I'm feeling, betrayed. Someone dishonored this house by bringing that crap in here, and I'll tell you what, when I find out who. I'll blog about that too, so you better get ready because I'm typing this shit furiously, culprit.

Orangeade, wtf? I hate it. Lemonade? Okay, I can understand that, cuz lemons are sour as fuck, but orangeade? What the hell? Who are you that created this? Go kill yourself. BRB, wait, let me just wikipedia this, maybe it'll have your address, nevermind. I hate you, creator of orangeade, stub your face on a wall of nails.

What is it, for people who can't handle the taste of orange juice or something? What are you, a pussy? Go eat a dick then, you pussy.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Barack the Terrorist

What's wrong with being Muslim or Arab? Absolutely nothing. While I don't follow my faith actively, I've still grown up around the muslim culture. All terrorists aren't muslims, all muslims aren't terrorists. America shouldn't associate islam immediately with extremists.

Now the subject of this blog is pretty simple, people have tried to rectify why they don't like Obama by saying he's a terrorist, he's arab, he's muslim. That's great, too bad it isn't true. His faith is regardless, and besides don't we live in a country that's supposedly seperate from the church (or in this case the mosque). What do people truly know about islam? Obviously not enough to make a fair assessment.

People are assholes, and I feel like I need to set an example for my heritage. I used to be ashamed, and scared to even mention what I was. It's all because of people's perceptions and pre-concieved notions based on stereotypes and lies.

Barrack Obama isn't arab he's a family man? I understand the sentiment, and i don't understand the fucking idiot who would even say that. There are over 7 million muslims in America, that's a pretty hefty chunk, and if you can't handle that we're here and that a few bad apples don't account for the entire tree, Then maybe you should consider finishing that application for the Klan.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

You're Doing it Wrong

So, you know how people are always like "Be True to yourself" and whatnot? Did you ever wonder if that really applies to people who are freaks of nature? I mean, sure being considered a freak is very much subjective. But I mean, there's some basic guidelines that would make a regular ol' Joe Six Pack/Hockey Mom/Maverick not want to associate themselves with said freakaweird.

Anyway, moving on to my subject of discussion. I have an issue with being pretty sarcastic, and kind of mean. For most people who know me well enough, they accept it (and in some cases enjoy it). But honestly, I feel like being a meandick sarcasticus is only going to result in me being lonely and whatnot.

So I decided to try and be nice (this is especially hard on the internet, because the universal language is "fuckwit"). Who knows, maybe it'll land me some sweet lady friends, instead of making them think I'm gay or a woman beater (Note to Self: Don't tell ladies you're going to punch them in the head. Even if you plan on doing it, becuase then it ruins that much needed stealth, women are natural ninjas)

So, we'll see how it goes.

Saturday, October 11, 2008


So, I got back from the Democratic Rally (and the King of Prussia Mall). I have to say I was definitely convinced that Barack Obama could be our next president after actually hearing him speak in person. The man loves his pie, apparently, true story, which is a quality fit for a leader. Anyway, it was great, his speech was great, he's said things that I've agreed with before. I just wish I could've gotten closer to the action (we were almost a block away, and people were pushed all up against each other).

The only thing that kind of pissed me off was the fact that I think some peopel went there just for the hype, and when they realized how crowded it would be, and how hot it was, they decided to leave. But the point isn't just to go see some kind of celebrity, man, he's our next president! What the hell!? Are you paying attention to anything he's saying? does it even matter to you?

I also hate how people bring their kids to the rally, it's hot, and crowded, which is hardly safe for a kid who can't even walk, man. But these are truly small things in the bigger picture, the man brings hope, and there's good reason for us to believe in Obama.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

deus ubdted

So, I think I've been neglectful enough when it comes to my blog. So in apology, I will post a second blog today. Some updates! My birthday was several weeks ago, but my friends gifted me today. Their gifts were pretty sweet, I got a lolcat book (because I"m from the internet), a book with pictures of Sarah Palin's face photoshopped onto junk, and Wanted the graphic novel (SUHHHWEETT!), also I got an inflatable zombie, you know, becuase I'm a necrophiliac.

Anyway, on Saturday I'm going to a rally for Barack Obama in Phillydelphiyay! this should be fun! I'm going to wear underwear and everything!

Stuff I like: August/September

So, it's been a while right? Man I suck at updating this. Oh well. Here's a new list of stuff I'm liking right now as of currently (right now [as of currently])

Music: Grizzly Bear, The Dodos
Books: What White People Like
Graphic Novels/Comics: Tom Strong, Ultimate Origins, Marvel Zombies 3
Artists: Guy McKinley, Cesar Moreno
Games: Braid, Castle Crashers, Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire in the Rift
Movies: (I FINALLY SAW) the Fall

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Things I Like: July

I think every month I'm going to try and post a list of things I'm currently digging at the moment. So here's my first list!

Interpol, Sneaker Pimps
Book(s): Zoology, World War Z
Graphic Novels/Comics: Earth X, Marvels
Artists: Ashley Wood, Gabriel Ba
Movies: Batman: Gotham Knight

That's about it, I like some stuff, now you know!

Monday, July 7, 2008

Driving Facts

With the rising price of gas, and oilgas, and gasoil, and oil, and my job being primarily to deliver food to "well paying" customers, I decided to see what the miles per gallon rating my car is getting. Now, a few factors fit in to my rating that I have to take into consideration, my job consists of a lot of starting and stopping, turning on the ignition burns a small fraction of your gas, and doing it in a high volume will probably take a chunk out of your tank. Anyways, so I filled up my tank last week and reset my odometer thing to 0. As the work week progressed my tank slowly got closer to empty, and when it got as close to empty as I think I could safely drive with, I filled it back up to see how many gallons I used, and I looked at my odometer.

I got roughly 252 miles on about 13.5 gallons. Looking through the power of my interweb, I found out that my car should be running about 20 mpg city, and 28 mpg highway. with the power of the calcumalator, I found out my car runs about 19 mpg, so... yeah.


this was a really boring blog. My penises fuel rating is actually much better.

Saturday, July 5, 2008


One of my managers is on an eternal hunt for bitches. Bitches is a term often used in a derogitory manner to describe women, or people who have women parts, or dogs of the female variety. While personally, I am not too interested in bitch hunting, but it's always interesting hearing his stories. After a long one sided discussion about the places where's he got freaky with mad bitches (mad bitches is a demonination describing the intense volume of said bitches, not the demeanor in which they were at the time of said boinking). I was surprised! He gets so many bitches! I don't even think I've ever met that many bitches, maybe like 3 or 4, but they were kind of mean, I don't know if I want to touch them with my peepee like that. I recall once he was talking to me about how he watches CBS, because all he sees is B.S. He's a fountain of knowledge, I feel like I can learn a lot from this man.

That shit is deep.

his knees is deep.

in bitches.

Friday, July 4, 2008

Internet Funny/Real World Funny

Some people find me funny (Like my 2 year old nephew), while many people don't (like my mom). I find that one of my few redeeming characteristics is sometimes I say awkward things and in order for there not to be be that weird silence, sometimes people do this thing called laughing. Some might say I'm funny, those people are nice. Some people might say I'm lame, though, I can't imagine who would (other than my mom). Anyways, when it comes down to it, some peole are in person funny, some people are text funny.

I find that majority of the time, I'm less likely to screw up the delivery on a witty quip if I type it out, as opposed to saying it in person. I'll be completely honest, unless you actually know me, and even then, you have to had practically given birth to me (like my mom), you can't really tell whether I'm being completely serious or being sarcastic. Anyways, I like making people laugh, it's better than sulking, for one, so when I make people laugh, it gives me inside smiles.

Being funny in the real world is great, but there's a significantly greater chance of you looking obnoxious instead of looing witty in person. So I guess it' better to play it safe, right?

I remember one time, I was liek "hey, I was thinking about doing stand up" and then someone was like "but you have to be funny..." (thanks mom). The problem with stand up comedy is like, you have to be ON all the time. In situations that make me nervous, I struggle to overcome my shyness and in an attempt to be ON, I just end up looking like a dweeb. It's not that bad to look like a dweeb on the internet, because you have the backspace button. Plus, if you're like me, and you use random commas and punctuation as well as spell whole words out, that shit confuses people (use it to your advantage).

Anyways, I wish I was ON all the time. That would be sweet. I also wish I didn't fall into that "fat guy who says funny things" stereotype, so I try and be tough and silent. But unless you're hot and built, being tough and silent immediately becomes being anti-social and awkward. Which I'm totally not, so shut up (I'm talking to you Mom).

Tuesday, June 3, 2008







Monday, June 2, 2008

Middle East Not Middle Earth

Well, you know. I haven't been updating my blog because I felt like I had nothing new to say, because my life is boring. But then I realized something, although every day is exactly the same for me, I do happen to have SOMETHING to blog about. I read Comics (Specifically trade paperbacks and graphic novels). Anyways, I have something to update my blog with. Man, I'm retarded and I don't even know....

Anyways, recently I read "Pride of Baghdad". It's tells the fictional story of four lions who escaped the Baghdad Zoo upon the American bombings in 2003. According to Wikipedia, it was actually released on my birthday, 2 years ago (No effin' way!). Anyways, the story is written by
Brian K. Vaughan, and illustrated by Niko Henrichon.

I made a blog on Threadless about comics/graphic novels that people have recently read. Along with some other comics, people had suggested picking up Pride of Baghdad. I usually head over to Borders Books every week or so because they e-mail me coupon codes thanks to their zweet rewards programs. So, recently I headed over to the ol' bookstore with a sweet 25% off coupon and I went in originally looking for Charles Burns Black Hole, but instead I found this gem. I was a little bummed that the one time I come into Borders and finally try and purchase Black Hole, it's sold out (seriously, I've gone into borders so many times and picked it up, only to put it down to get some lame Spider-Man TPB). But, picking up Pride of Baghdad was definitely worth it.

First of all, I haven't followed Brian K. Vaughan that thoroughly but I was familiar with his work. I had read the first 3 volumes of Y: the Last Man and I was pretty enthralled by the story, the only issue is I have so many other comics that I'm reading heat i haven't really been following the series as deeply as I do with other comics. At the same time, I've been following Ultimate X-men, and the current volume I'm on, and the few volumes to follow it have been written by Bendis, and to be honest, the issues I had read thus far (of X-men) had actually been really interesting. Anyways, we can discuss Ultimate X-men another time, but I'd like to add that on numerous occasions I've been suggested to read Runaways (which was also written by Bendis), so I was pretty confident in the awesomeness that would soon sex up my brain.

So, I started reading my book the day that I got it. I actually finished it that same night (which isn't a very common occurance with me). I think what aided me in really loving the book was the illustrating. The animals were drawn beautifully, the inking was done equally well. My favorite thing about the art was how diverse the landscape changed throughout the story. The way the landscapes were done really helped me invision the sort of amazement that the Lions felt as they were finally "free".

The only issue I sort of had with the book is that it felt like it ended so abruptly. The pacing was done well, it was a pretty lengthy story. However, I wish that the book had gone into more detail about each Lion's individual story, it gave brief indications about their pasts, but I really wanted to know more. It felt like just as soon as I started getting to know each Lion's unique personality, the story ended. But I also feel like the abrupt ending to the story was really what made me love this book, I won't go into details as to what happens at the end. But it definitely characterized the animosity and immorality that humans can really display.

I highly recommend Pride of Baghdad to anyone who enjoys a good story. However, this book is probably not the best to share with the little ones, or anyone who doesn't feel comfortable seeing giraffe's getting their head blown off (although, it's pretty awesome).

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

The Walking Dead

I've been reading the walking dead now, at an irregular pace. I picked up a trade of the first volume some time last summer, and I have like 4309430493 comics that I read, but I finally picked up volume 5 last week, read it right away, and it was definitely wroth it. For most stories with me, they start off like 'OMG' and then slowly they're like "" and then finally they're like "....oh my god, this sucks" but with this, it's definitely getting exponentially better with each trade that I've purchased and read. If you like zombies, and you like boners, and you like having boners, and you want to talk about your boners, please e-mail me. If you like a good story, about zombies, and you want to see some pret picz, check out teh Walking Dead.

Monday, May 12, 2008


Man, you know how people think south asian accents are hilarious. and they're always exaggerated? Well, they are pretty hilarious. Indian accents are probably the funniest accents ever, because people with indian accents always sound so fucking happy. True story. It's not racist cuz I'm braun.

Sunday, May 4, 2008


I haven't updated my blog in a while. So, this is an update.

Actually, that's a gardenhose. This is an update, I have to poop. Now you know about what's going on in my life. Now you know that I'm about to shit in my pants.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Help out the Kids! :O!

I'm super psyched about becoming a big brother with the Delaware chapter of the Big Brother Big Sisters program. But I think that this will encompass a lot more tameness, and maturity. No more poop or tasteless pedofilia related jokes. I gotsta be a good guy! :O Anyways, everything is all clear, except for my vehicle history report. But I don't think they're going to be like "oh, you can't do this anymore because one time you rear ended these white girlzz while they were on their way to the clubs". That would be wack, though, if that happened.

Saturday, March 22, 2008



Don't F***ing Close the Light Size: 92.9 MB

1. The Ladies in My Town All Know My Name (Except This one, She thinks my name is Brian)- Strong Bad
2. Mess Your Hair Up - White Denim
3.Wiggy (Bomberman 2) - The Advantage
4.Moonage Daydream - David Bowie
5.Mussolini Vs. Stalin - Gogol Bordello
6.Layla - Derek and the Dominoes
7.Come All You Weary - Thrice
8.Pinball Wizard - The Who
9.Brandenburg - Beirut
10.Burning - Whitest Boy Alive
11.While My Guitar Gently Weeps- The Beatles
12.Leave Us Alone - Joseph Arthur
13.Crystal Ball- Styx
14.Ganguro Girl- Datarock
15.Cat Diesel- K-os
16.All Along the Watchtower -The Jimi Hendrix Experience
17.Man With a Plan - Tacks, the Boy Disaster

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Peaches Valentine

So, it's been a few days since I posted in here. :O!

I really wish I had something to talk about...or Readers for that matter.

I guess I'll talk about something that I really like. Namely, the Goon. It's a comic created by Eric Powell, basically about...well...a Goon. I mean the main character is basically Muscleman number one for a mobster by the name of Labrazio. Anyways, I have a thing for Zombies, unnecessary violence, humor, mobsters, lizard creatures, pants poopin' retards, robots, and incest.


okay not so much incest.

But the Goon definitely includes all of the above subjects, it's funny, it's silly, it's suspenseful at times, and sometimes it's even sad. I mean, I like the Goon so much that the URL for my blog is essentially the name of a character that appears in the story a few times. it was actually a toss up between Sherriff Buzzard (a cursed, zombie eating, oldfaceded former sheriff of some random town in the middle of Bumblef***), or Peaches Valentine (another character from the Goon, who does a lot of pooping of his pants). Anyways, I like this comic. You should like it too. Seriously, I'll let you borrow it.

Monday, March 3, 2008


Monday was a beautiful day. I didn't do anything special, except listen to some awesome music. Anyways, here's the mix I was jammin' to yesterday.

Size: 87.3 MB
1)Kraid's Lair (Metroid) - The Advantage
2)We Are the Sleepyheads- Belle and Sebastian
3)Don't Fear the Reaper (Extended)- Blue Oyster Cult
5)Our Lives are Shaped by What We Love- Mr. Scruff
6)She's Not There- The Zombies
7)How's it Going to Be- Third Eye Blind
8)Ain't No Sunshine- Bill Withers
9)In the Garage- Weezer
10)Easykill- We Are Scientists
11)Standing in the Rain- Billy Talent
12)The Mole- The Bags
13)Higher Power (Kalodner Version)- Boston
14)Wheel in the Sky- Journey
15)Hole in My LIfe- The Police
16)School- Supertramp

The Advantage is a band that mainly performs instrumental versions of old NES game songs, I must say, they are pretty amazing. A few of the songs were stuck in my head thanks to friends, and youtube videos. Anyways, it's a pretty diverse mix. I'll just go ahead and include 2 of my previous mixxes too, just for fun.

WICTORY BATTLE Video Game Music mix I
Size: 60.4 MB

1) Battle Theme - Final Fantasy VI
2)Sigma Palace Stage 1- Megaman: Maverick Hunter X (Megaman X)
3)Massive Stroke (Arzail Theme)- Chaos Legion
4)Yagyu Vs. Yagyu- Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams
5)Killer Instinct OC Remix- Killer Instinct
6)First Flight- Ace Combat 5
7)Koopa Battle- Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island
8)Into the Dark Night- Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrows
9)Main Theme- Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
10)Trisection- Final Fantasy Tactics
11)Emporer- Ninja Gaiden
12)Metal Battle- Super Smash Bros. Melee
13)Moonlit Wilderness - Tekken 5
14)Vergil: Second Battle- Devil May Cry 3
15)Vim and Vigor- Kingdom Hearts 2

This is exactly what the title says. It's a wideogame mix that my friend requested, uhm....expect a lot of generic techno and electric guitar. The battle with Bowser Jr. music is insane though, it's still the most awesome thing ever.

Latex Balloons Mix !CLICKHERE!
Size: 71.49 MB

1) Killers - Shellac
2)Devil's Gotta Run - Mr. Scruff
3)Cato as a Pun - Of Montreal
4)Greatest Mistake - Handsome Boys Modeling School
5)Kayasuma - Dredg
6)2080 - Yeasayer
7)Take Two Copies - Busdriver/Z-trip
8)King of the Carrot Flowers Pt. I - Neutral Milk Hotel
9)Trampled Under Foot - Led Zeppelin
10)Mark On The Bus - Beastie Boys
11)3030 - Deltron

This was the first playlist I ever made available to DL. The beastie boys track on here isn't what you'd expect from the Beastie Boys at all, it's pretty sweet. Aside from that, 2080 is still one of my favorite current songs even now, and I made this mix more than 2 months ago...

Keep in mind that all of these mixxes are saved as .rar zip files, so you should probably look up WinRAR before you D/L them. Uhm, I ain't gots nothing else aside from that, so Enjoy. :B!

Chule Muzzik

I acquired this sweet music mix thing called "The Rolling Stone Magazines 500 greatest songs of all time". You know, because there always seems to be gaps in my music library that can only be filled by some awesome oldies. Anyways, I haven't listened to all 500 songs, in fact, I haven't even looked at all 500 but so far I'm pretty sure the selections cover a pretty decent part of the music genres we commonly recognize. I've heard Public Enemy, Al Green, Afrikaa Bambata, The Clash, The Beatles and all this other creayap. I approve :O! I'm also acquiring the 500 best rock classicz, just in case, you know, because I need like 3049304934 different versions of "Paint it Black".

Have a nice exist!

Sunday, March 2, 2008


I bought a chair today. For my computer room...It's a room, where our computer is. There's also a sewing machine. One time I found out my mom wasn't biologically related to me, so I ran away from home only to find out my real parents were jewel thieves. Quirky humor ensued.

man, this blog is starting out so interesting and great :O!

Saturday, March 1, 2008


I'm a chubby brown kid from Delaware.

Lived here my entire life.

Delaware and I have a love hate relationship.

It's small, it's cute, it's redundant.

I read comics.

I like them.

Every Wednesday, I go to Captain Blue Hen Comics.

It's nice.

This is a recent routine.

I deliver pizzas.

It's not that glamorous.

It funds my addictions though.

My addictions being comics...

and Crystal Meth.

I like girls.

With little boy hair cuts.

That will kick my ass.

But at the same time, make me a sandwich.

I like them.

I like Beast.

They don't like Beast.

They don't like me.

I want to do something.



Not related to drug dealing.

I'm looking for an organization.

One that I can contribute to.

One that will benefit my fellow man.

I like naps, movies, math, music, and walking around in my boxxers.

I think that basically covers the things that you'll probably expect from my blogs, sans the random bolding of text, and the initial lameness of this blog. See me learn, see me grow, see me bitch, see me moan, pray I finally find a girl who doesn't think I'm hideous, and too geeky, pray I don't dwell on my girllackingness. Ooh, I like this song, brb.

Here's a random guy.